A Juggling Act

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A Juggling Act

Posted by Susan V. Brewer in Balance, Coaching, Codependency, Coping Skills, Feelings, Goal-Setting, Relationships, Self-Care 25 Mar 2016

Sometimes life seems like a juggling act with how many things you can juggle at one time in any given moment, hour, day or even week. When I listen to women that I work with I do my best to help them understand why “ME” time is important to them when they are taking care of everyone else’s needs in the home, at work and in any of their relationships with others. For a lot of women it can be difficult to first find time for themselves let alone being willing to give up that time for “their” needs.
Women who are by nature caretakers experience difficulty in putting their needs first or second. They tend to put themselves last without even giving it a second thought and sometimes not even realizing that they have done this at all. They become so overwhelmed with all of their responsibilities to others that they can’t give themselves permission to do something for themselves. They often feel selfish and/or guilty. I help them to understand that if they do not take care of and do things for themselves that eventually things are going to fall apart and than what?
The process for some women is slow with carving out time and learning how to be more gentle with themselves and realize that they to have needs. The main reason it can be slow is because it doesn’t seem possible to find time and ask for what they need. Most women specifically overachieving women with children want to be able to do it all. It makes them feel good about themselves in a positive way. While this can be positive; that is where it can get tricky and become negative if that becomes the only way they feel good about themselves. This dance at times will create the belief system that “I am not doing enough”. So women will keep doing more and putting more on their plate because while on one hand it makes them feel good about themselves on the other hand they feel overwhelmed and resentful that they are doing it all. It is a balancing act. This is what I educate and support them with so that they can feel good about themselves for who they are and not only with what they do for others.
My whole motto is about creating and restoring balance in our lives, no matter how simple or a complicated life we may live. Simply put balance is about fulfilling our responsibilities and knowing when to relax and have fun. I often say that we can complicate things and get in our own way of having the life we want to have because we have too many expectations of ourselves and others which in a fair amount of cases are often unrealistic and self-defeating. In order to halt this behavior knowing who we are and what we want out of our life in relation to others in essential to create balance.
So go forth and make nice with yourself you will be a lot happier, freer and balanced…. Trust Me…

Susan V. Brewer

Susan V. Brewer is a Certified Life Coach and Psychotherapist in the Upper Bucks County Area.  She graduated in 1987 from Kutztown University with a BS in Criminal Justice and Sociology. She became a Certified Life & Career Coach in June of 2006 and a Certified Relationship Coach in December of 2016. She specializes in adoption, codependency, relationship issues, substance abuse, self-esteem and life transitions. Her belief is “that all persons are truly greater than they think they are.”

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