It can be so difficult if you are one of those people who like to please others. It can derive from a need to get approval from others that you are this wonderful person. It can be about not wanting conflict with others. Sometimes you can feel good about yourself because you made someone happy. It can be a learned behavior that you witnessed it growing up by another adult so you automatically have been conditioned to be a pleaser. The problem with being a pleaser is that you often neglect yourself and your needs and can become resentful when others do not react or respond the way you think they should when you have done a good deed for them. So the best thing you can do is Ask yourself why you are doing this pleasing behavior? What are you getting out of it? Is it worth it or is the relationship worth it? Depending upon your answer you will either feel good about it or victimized about your inability to set limits. Pleasing only has its benefits when it is pure of heart and true to who you are as a person.