Relationships II

Relationships II

Posted by Susan V. Brewer in Balance, Coping Skills, Feelings, Relationships, Self-Care 25 Jul 2015

In last month’s article I talked about relationships the ones that can be difficult and problematic for us. This month how about we talk about the good things that come from having relationships with others. Sometimes we have a tendency to focus on the negative ones because we wish that things could be different and that everything would all be good. However this is not necessarily realistic especially when it comes to our relationships with family and coworkers; unless of course you decide to “disown” certain family members or get a new job; you will need to learn how to either get along with others or detach from them. So let’s talk about the positive people in our lives who give us lots of love and attention and make us feel good. My hope is that you have at least 4-5 people in your life if not more that can make you smile and you look forward to spending time with them.
This is the time of year when most people go on vacation for the summer to the beach or the mountains or to visit family in another state. The anticipation of seeing family you haven’t seen in awhile, going to the beach, walking on the boardwalk, eating soft serve ice cream…. Whatever it is that you enjoy about your vacation. For those visiting family it is about reminiscing and catching up on their lives to the wee hours of the morning, having a few drinks and telling stories and laughing about nothing or about everything. These are the times that give us pleasure and we appreciate the relationships that we do have, that make us feel good about ourselves and our life in general that we forget about the ones that create drama and stress for us. Not that they do not come up in our conversations but we tend to dwell less on them when we are away and enjoying ourselves. Sometimes that is the whole point in going away is for us to forget about all of that nonsense and chaos because it really doesn’t matter in that moment.
It is so important to enjoy every moment if possible when we are with those that we just plain enjoy. Even being idle and sitting on the beach and not talking is connecting with our friends and family. Just by being in each others presence we feel good. Nothing has to be said or done just a simple glance or smile or giggle will do. If a vacation is not in your horizon or budget you can plan your own home vacation and invite friends and family over and have a cook out and do all those things and on the days off sit outside read a book, have a nice lunch or meal with yourself or your favorite people. Surround yourself at home with thoughts of joy and peace and call it your vacation from the drama/chaos. Make a decision to be happy and to focus only on the positive in your life. It would be really nice if we could have a life without stress or problems but part of life is about that and hopefully we learn and grow from these experiences and make good decisions for ourselves about who we want in our life and that they compliment us and just make us feel good. It is that simple…

Susan V. Brewer

Susan V. Brewer is a Certified Life Coach and Psychotherapist in the Upper Bucks County Area.  She graduated in 1987 from Kutztown University with a BS in Criminal Justice and Sociology. She became a Certified Life & Career Coach in June of 2006 and a Certified Relationship Coach in December of 2016. She specializes in adoption, codependency, relationship issues, substance abuse, self-esteem and life transitions. Her belief is “that all persons are truly greater than they think they are.”

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