“What is Enough?”


“What is Enough?”

Posted by Susan V. Brewer in Alcohol and Drugs, Balance, Coaching, Codependency, Coping Skills, Counseling, Feelings, Goal-Setting 20 Jun 2017

I know I have written about this topic before however I feel that it continues to come up quite often in my life and with my clients. In general I believe that a fair amount of my clients are very hard on themselves and often compare themselves to others which inevitably creates the feeling of “am I enough”. This feeling can be overwhelming and devastating for some people. I on occasion have felt this way whenever I am going through something in my life that is very personal for me or I am feeling vulnerable with life stressors.
I have talked about my belief that when we are not feeling good about ourselves that there is a mantra or personal statement that we say about ourselves. Not being good enough is one of the main feelings/statements that most of my clients will describe that they feel. Once we identify this feeling and of course feel these feelings then we can move on and say affirmations to ourselves. We do this by identifying our strengths and detaching from our negative feelings.
Most of our feelings of not being or feeling enough can be easily remedied once we figure out why we feel this way, where did this come from, etc. Some to these deep-rooted feelings/beliefs come from childhood and they can become ingrained in our belief system which is why we can become so hard on ourselves and not give ourselves any slack. So, then the end result is we are not happy and satisfied with our lives. Because all we are doing is comparing ourselves with others and the distorted beliefs we have about who we are supposed to be, what we are supposed to be doing, how much money we make, what kind of car we drive, where we live, etc.
The concept of not being enough and happiness can go hand in hand because you can become never satisfied with your life. Some people actually don’t know what happiness looks like because they have lived their lives a certain way and have become so entrenched in these beliefs that nothing makes them happy. And if they are happy they may know it but it would not be enough. So, the concept of “keeping it simple” and “living in the moment” is the ultimate goal. You can still strive to have more and be more but with finding the balance of being able to live in the moment and enjoy your life on the down time.
So, I would encourage those of you who are hard on yourselves to give yourself a break and take a step back and look at all you have accomplished and who you are and what you offer to others and give thanks, be happy but especially say “I am enough… I am really good… I have provided a good life for myself and my family… I am worthy of everything good life has to offer me… I am truly enough.”

Susan V. Brewer

Susan V. Brewer is a Certified Life Coach and Psychotherapist in the Upper Bucks County Area.  She graduated in 1987 from Kutztown University with a BS in Criminal Justice and Sociology. She became a Certified Life & Career Coach in June of 2006 and a Certified Relationship Coach in December of 2016. She specializes in adoption, codependency, relationship issues, substance abuse, self-esteem and life transitions. Her belief is “that all persons are truly greater than they think they are.”

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